Have you ever had a day where you just wanted to feel sorry for yourself? Poor Donna, I have cancer. Poor Donna, our money ran out months ago. Poor Donna, I feel nauseous and tired. Poor Donna, my hair is getting ready to fall out. Poor Donna, I have a metal taste in my mouth. Poor Donna, I have sores on my tongue. Poor Donna … Poor Donna
I could easily let myself be there – the world would totally understand and approve. Well, God doesn’t approve! He wants me to stay focused on how blessed I am! Sometimes, God may put a person or thing in your path to give you that gentle reminder.
Last night at my support group – although I wasn’t in a “pity party” mood – I got a reminder of how blessed I am. A young 32 Pilipino girl walked into our group. She was crying. She sat down and began to tell us her story – get your tissue ready! She was selected 3 years ago to come over to America to be a teacher. She had to learn English etc. Yes, they were the “token” ethnic teachers. It’s been very hard not knowing much English – the way America works and knowing NO one! She then did make a wrong choice and found herself pregnant. Although the dad appears to be willing to help out – in his schedule – there is no future plans for the 2 of them to be together. Two weeks ago, she was diagnosed with breast cancer. They had to do an immediate C-section (at 36 weeks) to remove the baby. A few days after the baby was born she had a mastectomy. She begins her chemo on Feb 10th – 4 cycles of the not so fun drug that I am receiving. She’ll be nauseous, fatigued etc. from the chemo while taking care of a newborn – while worrying that if America doesn’t want her to teach next year, she’ll loose insurance and be shipped back home etc. etc. etc. I AM BLESSED!
So, let’s look back at my life. I have an incredible husband and 2 little kids that are helping with my “bad days”. I have a church family that supports me with dinners, childcare, parties to keep my spirits high, and lots and lots of prayers. I have neighbors that check on me daily seeing if I need help with the kids. I have one of Lon’s clients bringing over many frozen dinners that I just need to thaw and heat. On paper we may look bankrupt, but I haven’t gone a without a meal for my family and the earliest we can loose the house (which I don’t think is in God’s plans) is in 3 months. I have WONDERFUL doctors and nurses that administer my chemo and treat me like I am the only patient they have. I had hats and wigs given to me as presents. I don’t think I’ll go on – you see the picture! BUT, I could go on – that’s the point.
No matter how terrible life looks – we have more blessings than hardships! We just need to remember where to focus. Once it becomes habit to focus on the positive – the blessings – I have found that God gives you another wonderful gift – to truly have a joy when you see hardships. For you can know that you don’t get what you can’t handle – with God’s help – and after the hardship’s lesson, you will LOVE who you have become.
Keona wrote me an email and said, “Mom, I wish you didn’t have cancer!” She has been so sweet to me. I replied, “Keona, I am glad I do! God thinks I’m strong enough to handle it and he’ll teach me lessons to make me more like Him”. Keona replied back (yes, our family communicates through email – thanks daddy), “Mom, you are right. I can’t wait to see how much bad stuff God thinks I can handle. Think mom, I’m starting with my own mom having cancer!” Ok, to the ordinary person – we look CRAZY!!!! You see my daughter and I laughing and carrying on about wanting “bad things”. The realization – my daughter and I know God’s peace and trust Him when He says He loves us. We know He knows best! I would prefer to go without the “bad stuff” – but I know God uses it to mold and develop me!
What do you do when you see a “bad thing” coming your direction? Do you flee? Get angry? It’s your choice how to react. Try to take hold of whatever comes your way … find the positive … and then praise God for the outcome – you being one step closer to being like your heavenly Daddy!
Dear Donna,
Thank you for sharing your faith. You are an inspiration to me as I go through my life trial. I do believe as you do that I am blessed that God believes I can handle so much. I needed this reminder today.
Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers.
God Bless You!
Terry